Wierd job request at WSU

It's been a while since I last posted. I just had an odd experience and though, "Hey! I should blog this!" So now all you lucky people get to share. Lucky you.

So, I had been talking with someone in the computer lab on campus and I turned around to leave. Blam. There was an old guy in suit standing right behind me. Staring at me. I stepped back and looked for a way around him, but he was pretty large and had me trapped. Maybe he just didn't realize I was there....

Me: "Uh... hi."
Him: "Hi."

Pause. Okay, he definitely knew I was there after that. I stood wondering if he could sense the uncomfortable silence too.

Me: "Can I help you?"
Him: "I want a job."

He shoves a resume printed on periwinkle blue card stock into my hands. I notice that his job experience for the last five years consists of "yard work and partnership and odd jobs." At the bottom of the paper was a handwritten scrawl "see back" or maybe it was "sec rqcvl".

I turn the paper over. Ah! His education experience! It appears that he went to "Weber State College English before U of U Partial paid before Weber State University" and he majored in Information Systems with a "near minor in Math." Oh, and "a good Dad and great Mom taught me well and more computer classes."

Me: "Well, um... I don't know what I'm going to do with this. Why don't you take it upstairs to the career fair."
Him: "Yes. I'm going up there next."
Me: "Good, why don't you take this with you? It's not going to do me any good."
Him: "No, keep it. Give to a professor if they need to hire someone."

As he walked off, I suddenly realized what I could do with this resume... I could share it with you! I'll finish with a few more gems taken from this periwinkle blue resume:

"BS degree from Weber State enough cost but quick learner and trying to keep current."
"Can Speak Mandarin Chinese, good education."
"Installed Word and Excel."
"Maintained apartments fixed."
"1992 to 2002 Worked for several employers."

And last but not least:

"Recycles and cares about people."